The fuck, Fanstoys?


We all want a decent Masterpiece Arcee. And Fanstoys look the like the ones to deliver it. Whoop! This is all going to be great, right?


She looks fantastic, doesn’t she?


Oh man, I can’t wait!


Hmm, I’m not quite sure why she’s standing like that, but OK, she still looks cool.


Oh. Right. Hmm, well, at least the articulation is good, I guess…


Oh right, I see. Well done Fanstoys. You went right there, then. And you’re including an orgasm face in the box, are you? Great.

Isn’t it really just super-fucking-lame that these companies seem unable to sell female-styled robots without resorting to this sort of shite? Who are these manchildren coming up with all this?

“But if you’re upset about Springer being made to have simulated fellatio with Arcee, why aren’t you equally as upset about her being pink and having lipstick and heels?” the knobheads cry out in a feeble attempt at justifying their unhealthy hentai masturbating habits.

There is absolutely a debate to be had about Arcee’s stylings as seen in Transformers: The Movie. The colour, the heels, the lips – it’s all bullshit. And the modern takes on the Arcee character are to be applauded for (mostly) doing away with them.


However, one must also see all of this through the lens of the period in which it was released. This in no way excuses it (any more than an ousted sexual predator arguing that “things were different in the ’80s” excuses that), but we are in many instances nostalgia collectors. The Arcee of our childhoods¬†is¬†this Arcee, and in a Masterpiece Movie lineup (which I am collecting) she is a pivotal part, bullshit stylings and all.

All of which is a fucking world away from a modern company in 2017 choosing to market this figure in a way in which they would not even dream of doing with a non-female robot.

Thus, I feel very fucking comfortable perched on top of this high horse.

Oh, and we haven’t forgotten about you either, Toyworld.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s